Personal Life Meet Twitter (aka World of Assholes)

**Note: There is a really good chance that some of these offending tweets are triggering.
This is your warning, should you choose to continue.

I suspect there is going to be some backlash for this post, and realistically, I’m okay with that. I’ve said my piece about feminism and how to interact with each other. I’ve shared a little bit about my personal life in my most recent post. I’ve also drafted a ton of WoW-related blog posts, that may or may not ever see the light of the internet.

I’ve been around on the internet for a really long time. I’m talking about before half of the younger folks even knew what the internet was. When dial-up was standard, and you paid by the hour. So I’m no stranger to internet trolling and general assholery. However, I’ve done the best that I can at keeping my twitter timeline/feed to a select few whom I feel are able to handle themselves like adults. They can have conversations about certain controversial topics, or discuss lore about fictional characters. Not all of them love Doctor Who or knitting, but each person is mostly respectful and decent. That being said, I don’t tend to block people on twitter. Maybe unfollow them. I’m not afraid to explain why if someone questions why they’re being unfollowed. I’ve been unfollowed. It happens.

One thing I don’t expect to see is blatant misogyny and douchebaggery.

I know that when women speak out about feminism and mistreatment in the gaming world (and truthfully on the internet in general), there is a lot of backlash. Look at what happened to Anita Skarkeesian when she decided to open up a kickstarter to get funding for a video webseries about tropes and women. This isn’t rocket science people. There is a real fuckin’ issue with men on the internet. There’s a real fuckin’ issues with PEOPLE on the internet thinking they can be complete and utter assholes!

But I never thought I would be on the receiving end of some of that asshatery. Apparently I was wrong.

Someone I followed on Twitter retweeted something that was meant to be a joke. Except it really wasn’t that funny. I suspect if you find being an asshole and believing that women are less human than men, okay, sure it was funny… ish. Here’s the original offending tweet.


And my response to both parties.


By stating that I was offended, ProSexTips decided to rally the troops, all 70K+ of them. Here’s a retweet with the extended twitlonger text, of this guy asking his followers to send me offensive “jokes”.


And at that point, that’s when the shit hit the fan. What came after this rallying of the troops was nothing short of some of the most vile and despicable crap that people could ever say to another human. I retweeted some of it, so that the people on my own timeline could read it, but then I thought better of it, and ended up reporting most of them and blocking them. Which removed the retweets altogether. But here’s where all the fun begins. Wait until you get a load of some of these tweets, which are just so jaw-dropping. I have few words.


Clearly my looks have a whole lot to do with my opinion and offense-level of “the cupcake joke”. And Aaron Lee Bentley doesn’t understand how reading works, or he might have been able to figure out that I don’t actually follow the offender, @ProSexTips, but instead made the mistake of following fellow misogynist @FrostSorrow.


Some of the most offensive things here happen to be the females who also went along with this whole bashing the feminist nonsense, but also calling me a fat lesbian, as though either of those things should be something I’m deeply ashamed of. Regardless of the amount of truth in any of this, neither of those things are shameful. Apparently being offended by a misogynistic joke is also cause to be told I’m a virgin who will lose her virginity to her father. Wow. Just wow.


Being offended also means that I have no genitalia. There are questions as to whether or not there’s enough Scotch in the world to make me fuck-able. Questions as to my ability to give head. Women telling me my place is in the kitchen. My mom is apparently a whore. And another reference to “my place” being in the kitchen.


And these are the last of them. I actually reported @ProSexTips to twitter for harassment, since he decided that it would be “cute” to ask that I get tweeted really offensive shit. I suspect that Twitter either removed it or something happened to the handful of them that they directed at me, cause they’re gone now. There is still a trickle of people responding to me and they’re immediately reported as spam/harassment and blocked.

The worst thing is that it was so easy for him to get not just childish men and boys to respond this way, but to get women to treat another woman like that. Women, this does not make you “one of the guys.” This means that you are enabling men and saying that it’s okay to treat women like shit.

I did not hide a single one of the usernames. I do ask that you don’t harass them in turn. Don’t even engage them in conversation. It’s not worth the effort and it’s certainly not worth your time. You can, dear reader, go through and block them if you choose. It’ll stop any harassment headed your way by taking care of these offenders.

Last I leave you with this link to a video by a guy named Jay Smooth. Why is this video so important? Because not enough men are asking other men to stop with this kind of hate speech. It’s evident that a large portion of the internet male population thinks women are idiotic and deserve to be in the kitchen, so how do I expect men to take me seriously? I need the help of other men. Men who are willing to speak up and say something.

I don’t want to ever have children if this is what they have to look forward to. We’ve let this go on long enough.


  • alteregoliz

    So sorry to hear you were subjected to this sub-human vitriol. There are a ridiculous amount of creepizoids our there who have nothing better to do than victimize women in any way they can. Thank you for having the courage to speak your mind.

  • Katarnas

    It’s terrible that you had to contend with that simply for saying to the original tweeter and the RTer that you found something offensive.

    The fact that some of the idiots that then followed couldn’t even be bothered to check what they were saying for truth (such as HJ saying you followed PST) just highlights even more what a bunch of morons these people are.

    You have to stand up to things you find wrong and you did it the right way, but some people never like others giving their opinion (and yes, men seem to be the worst for that ^^)

    It’s as simple as you are right and they are wrong but don’t want to accept it. I just hope you don’t suffer any more backlash from this.

    Incidents like this make me embarrassed to be male.


  • Thespius


    This whole situation disgusts me. As a male, I’m always sad when people crack jokes like this specifically to insult people. I definitely agree that people need to be careful about how they word things and who’s listening.

    After just dealing with an in-guild issue that dealt with an ill-themed joke, I’ve quickly learned to be aware of who you’re talking to. If I make a minor crack about women (I make plenty about men, too), it’s always a little tongue-in-cheek. However, I NEVER make jokes along those lines that you experienced. I’ve heard my share of “actor/theatre = you must be a homo” jokes, and I don’t tolerate them. The hate that poured out of those people is just unreal. It’s that old mantra of “Nice person + Internet Anonymity = Asshole”. Just unacceptable. I experienced a similar thing when I defended public school teachers. A conservative “blogger”, retweeted my tweet to his followers, and I got crap from everyone for the rest of the day. It’s not fun. That type of assault is uncalled for.

    You have every right to be offended by an ill-themed joked. They just made themselves look like assholes for firing back like they did. I fear that we’re headed towards a compassion-less society. We just have to fight to keep people aware that they need to censor their thoughts.

  • Marty

    It seems to be on the rise lately :( Few forums I used to be an active member on just don’t even visit any more as attitude towards women just seems to be “should be in kitchen” or “would/wouldnt bang that”. Of course as a male speaking out about it I must obviously be gay or enjoy having sex with my mother. So sadly I just don’t bother any more :(

  • Ironyca

    That’s horrible, those tweets are horrible. So much backlash for sooo little, all you did was say you were offended, you didn’t insult him or anything. The amount of bile is completely uncalled for.
    I get the impression that these kinds of people think they are the “righteous defenders” of freedom of speech, but ironically and maybe even consciously, they are attacking and attempting to eradicate any critical opinions of what they say and do. Quite the opposite of what freedom of speech is about and where will that leave us in the end?
    I also thought the Jay Smooth video was really good, very relevant to this discussion.

  • Aaron lee Bentley

    I did find it strange that the only person you chose to single out in the first grouping was the one person who asked an honest question. I guess my failure to understand how reading actually works is a personal fault of mine. I made zero reference to men being better than women, any degrading comments about you, your looks, your level of intelligence, or anything really. Now, without being able to read the post from your side, nor being able to see any following posts, insults, or personal attacks, I am still confused as to why, again, my honest question was the one you chose to fire back a personal insult. Do I think men are better than women? Not by a long shot. I watched my single mother work three jobs to raise me and my sister. I know that my spouse is one of the most intelligent and people on the planet. But then again, I can only assume you already categorized me into a male pig category. So hate breeds hate is the only outcome I see from any rebuttal by you or myself. I must again apologize for wondering why a person would follow an offensive twitter feed. Also, I apologize for my inability to posess reading skills, and for not knowing that you were following someone who re-tweeted the post.

    • Hestiah

      I wasn’t following ProSexTips. I was following Frostsorrow, whom I thought was a different person than what he ended up being. When I responded to the original offending tweet, I commented. It’s right there. I didn’t hide what I said. I didn’t respond to anyone. What others did in response to my retweeting is on them. I, unlike ProSexTips, didn’t ask anyone to do anything. I didn’t say “Go troll these people like the good little minions you are!”

      You clearly felt you had a point to come here and comment. You could easily have just avoided saying anything and leaving well enough alone.

      • Aaron lee Bentley

        I only chose to come here after you chose to single me out and insult me. You talk about personal attacks, then insult the one person who did not insult you. I can honestly say what I commented was not in malice, however it obviously was not taken that way. Now, by you eluding to me being illiterate was ment that way. You chose to attack me publicly, so by telling me I could have left well enough alone is a double a standard. I did not respond to anything by being told to go troll, I commented on the original post as it was made. Alas, we are at an impass, but again, I never insulted you, that was you choosing to insult me. I never would have know had this not been a public insult.

        • Hestiah

          And you keep coming back.

          I attacked everyone publicly. Had I not singled you out would it have actually changed anything? I’m not taking any of it down, and regardless of the severity o the commentary, I shared every tweet that was sent my way. Whether I called you out specifically by name or not wouldn’t have actually mattered to what my overall point was by creating the post.

          Internet trolls are assholes. Period.

          You’re not helping yourself at all by continuing to comment on it.

          How about you do both of us a favor and pretend I don’t exist anymore. Go about your life and don’t come back.

    • Hestiah

      Yeah, it became painfully obvious the type of people that followed ProSexTips. It’s really very sad. The harassment actually continued on for over a month after this post.

      I’m really very sorry to hear about what happened to you. I hope that you are doing well and getting whatever help you need.

      • Carolyn

        Thank you, Hestiah.
        Finding that the guy who raped me follows ProSexTips actually made me face the fact that he is a really sick, misogynistic person. We were friends before he raped me; at first blamed what he did on alcohol.
        What is really sad is that he wants his 12 year-old daughter to know that he is enjoys ProSexTips’ sexually sadistic “jokes” about women; the rapist creep lets his daughter follow his sick Twitter account. The weirdo also follows porn stars and tweets to them so that his daughter can see. How deranged. (In his fantasy mind, he actually believes his tweets are read by these women, who devalue themselves.) I wouldn’t be surprised if his own daughter is his next victim. I’m sure ProSexTips would be cheering him on.

        I have since learned how to tell if someone is a misogynist. This guy exhibited more subtle signs of that character trait before he tricked and raped me, but I missed them. Not going to allow that to happen again!

  • Fyn

    I can’t even comment how upset, mangry, and just……fucking angry this made me. I believe in freedom of speech, in equal right for both men and women…..but seriously, the internet needs a nanny. Seriously, these people all need an axe to the face, not even kidding. Same with men who make rape jokes, who make jokes about “womens place” same with women who support these men. Axe to the face.


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